The next day arrived, and I had mixed emotions. I was definitely feeling butterflies, which was something I'd so long forgotten I didn't know what it was at first. But I was scared. Terrified at the prospect that it was all some sort of cosmic joke. Here was this great looking guy, interesting, fun to talk to, etc., and why the hell would he be interested in plain old me? Mercy date. Easy mark. Oh, the whole gamut was run in my head.

I debated with J and L what I should do. L wisely didn't really give me much advice but listened to my insecurities and let me work it through on my own. J's advice - you're on holiday...go with the flow. Seize the adventure.

And there was a small part of me that whispered....it's been 1142 days. What if this is my last chance to get some? That part of me was DYING inside!

I knew he was on duty so there was no chance to see him again until that night. What a long day it was though! We spent the day hiking through the rainforests, and saw amazing vegetation. Bamboo centuries old. And humidity that made my hair frizz like I didn't know it could!

Finally, it was later in the afternoon, and I had mustered enough courage to call him and leave a message for him. At this point, I was at the 'You're on holidays...take a chance!' stage. I took a deep breath, tried to sound casual and left a message on his voicemail that we would be back at the bar at 9pm.

Hanging up the phone, I looked up at L and said, What the hell have I done? She said something I wasn't expecting... She said 'Well, there's more to him that meets the eye. Now I have to tell you what I know about him."

Um, 'scuze me??????

She told me that when I was in the bathroom the night before, he started talking to her. Turns out he had a different career before the Navy. He was a dancer. Well, not just any type of dancer...a Chippendale!

I felt like I'd been kicked in the stomach. OHMIGAWD! It was obvious now that I was just a conquest. It made me feel so gross.

I said to her 'You let me call a flippin' stripper?' 'You didn't say anything?' 'Are you insane?'

Her response 'I wanted you to be sure of why you were calling him and based on what YOU knew about him. But now that you know, be careful'.

L, J and I went for dinner. During dinner, I convinced myself that I was going to be ice-queen if he showed up at the bar. One drink and then walk away. No harm, no foul. I had made a commitment to be there and I would be but it would end there.

Ha!...funny how things change from your plans....